These feelings are pretty normal. Many don’t know how to describe the disconnect and detach. Perhaps it shows up as emotions, or confusion, or feeling isolated from others. Disconnect happens in many areas of life. I am bringing a few to the forefront to ponder over if it relates to you. This is not all encompassing. So please be aware there are many ways to feel disconnected. If it is not on the list please still seek help for what you are experiencing. One of our therapists can help! 

Disconnect with food 

Many people feel strange about food. They don’t know how much to eat or when. They worry about how much they are eating and will it change their body. They don’t like to eat in public or with others. Their taste buds are off and food just doesn’t taste right. They don’t like texture or colors. They are unsure if the food they are eating is healthy or true. A lot of people everywhere,  in all cultures and races and religions, can feel disconnected from the food they eat. Allergies and IBS can also cause frustration and disconnect with food. Fear of food and the pain it might cause in gas and bowel discomfort makes people feel disconnected from their taste buds. If this sounds like you, a specialist in eating disorders can help!

Disconnect in relationships 

Some might already know the concern or fear they have in relationships. Some people just give up. Some people feel they will never find love. Some will feel like an alien when talking to others. Disconnection is rampant in society these days. Those with anxiety might study about attachment issues, parenting styles, and romance. Others might just isolate and hide their confusion feeling disconnected from being able to communicate or share emotions one experiences. Vulnerability is not something that is taught everywhere and it takes time to connect to one’s own experience and emotions which usually helps connecting to others and their experiences. Some might have brain trauma and neurological differences that exacerbate being disconnected when speaking to others. This could create insecurity and fear. Therapy is a place to help process that. Sometimes disconnection shows up by getting a lot of feedback “You should go to therapy.” Or that “You are too emotional” and feeling unheard and unseen creates a lot of walls around the heart and emotions from being able to connect with others. 

Feeling disconnected when being neurodiverse 

A lot of people who experience different subtypes of neurodiversity can feel disconnected from others or society. The disconnect can cause isolation, confusion, withdrawal, depression, rejection fears, worry, rumination, obsessions to try and compensate to create a better connection. Therapy is a great place to process feelings of disconnect when having a different brain subtype. 

Disconnect due to Trauma

Many in life will experience intense traumas. This can bring about anxiety, fear, nightmares, worries, and being able to feel normal and like oneself again. Numbness is a word that gets used in trauma work. Some people don’t even know a trauma has happened but they feel lost, confused, and alienated from being happy and enjoying life. Disconnect is a big part of trauma where things that used to be one way are not so much. EMDR is a great place to process memories so the disconnect that is happening is not so overwhelming. 

How feeling disconnected plays out after experiencing loss

The disconnect can feel like an incredible shock! Many who have had loss will not enjoy things they use to, not be able to talk about things, not even know how to begin a new chapter or season. The loss can be so great there is just disconnection showing up everywhere. There can be avoidance too because the disconnect becomes the big wall to survive big emotions or experiences. A lot of people can feel disconnected to life after loss of someone, job, or dream. “Who am I and what do I now with myself?”

How it plays out in the body 

Because of our intense world that ells how to be, who to be and why to be … .We can become an enemy or frenemy to our own body. Diet culture plays into this but even religious trauma can make us feel very like an alien to our own body. “Do we even have a body?” The word “body” can be a trigger too. Navigating disconnect from one’s body whether because of an eating disorder, self hate, or trauma is a very delicate process. Disconnect shows up like apathy, anger, hate, frustration, jealousy, discontent, towards one body. The emotions become so intense that numbness happens and the disconnect from feeling one’s gut, one’s peace, looking in a mirror, getting dressed, intimacy. Disconnect happens when a witness’ own body is way more common than people think and can be treated by informed practitioners. 

Disconnect with moods 

We can even feel disconnected from our own emotions. We know we should feel one way but there are intense emotions that keep happening, depression and crying, or angry outbursts. We might wonder deep inside why these things are happening. A disconnect forms to survive the emotions. Or for some the emotions are just too extreme a constant numbness happens. THEre are no feelings. Both these extremes are scary to experience. Sometimes even shameful. Why is this happening? IN therapy we explore in a non judgmental environment why the disconnect is happening to what one feels and the way they think they should be feeling or want to feel. 

Disconnect with one’s job

This feeling can happen with anyone. There is no connection or drive to one’s job. A lot of articles will call this burnout. But it could also be related to fear, codependency, abuse at work, overstimulated, not being in the right career. But it shows up as this apathetic disconnect and that can create anxiety and worry. “Why do I feel this way.” Therapy is a good place to have open conversations and explore what is the cause of disconnect with one’s work. 

Disconnected when growing up

A lot of what we learned in childhood does not seem to play out in adulthood. There is sometimes this intense grief season of not being where we want or not being the person we thought we would be. This can ever scary and feel very shameful to talk about. And it can show up in apathy and disconnect from our friends and family. We might be too afraid to see that we are not happy. We don’t know what to say. A wall builds up around our heart and fear sets in. Or we just numb out and distract ourselves with substance abuse, TV, and social media. This might show up in motherhood, marriage, career, aging, etc. If something speaks to you, schedule a therapy session with one of our providers today. 

If anything highlighted sounded of interest, please schedule a call if you are experiencing any disconnection in your life today.